Fine

Well the doc says my tests came out negative and I am fine. I figured I was, but everyone was worried so I asked to be tested. I am uncomfortable but that goes along with the territory. At least I didn't have a horrible pregnancy. It's been pretty fair to me thus far. Thank you Lord!!!!
My cat was neutered yesterday. I felt bad for the poor little guy. I guess I am attached to him now. He has calmed down so much and become such a loving cat...I am hoping the surgery will make him even more calm. He got out of his crate and was all woozy from the drugs. He seemed to sense he was home though. Today he is getting to be more himself, being nosy as usual. But he still is acting a little dopey. He's all over Tim and I.....
Well I think I am in full nesting gear....I have an overwhelming urge to get my house perfect. Yesterday I washed the bathroom walls and trim and light fixtures, and cleaned out the junk drawer in the kitchen. There are many other things to organize as well. I am working on it!!! I know I won't have everything perfect, but honestly there is just too much stuff in this house. It needs to be gone through and thrown out!!! All of the baby's stuff is done. Various items assembled, room painted and decorated and put together, clothes washed and put away, bottles steralized, pacifiers steralized.....everything in it's place......now only if I could be ready, lol!!! Guess I am as ready as I will be. I can't wait to start wearing normal clothes again!!! I hate my clothing right now. Things I once thought were cute are now annoying!!!! And I have a closet full of shoes that are dying to be worn as soon as my swollen feet go down. Looking forward to that. Well I guess that's it for now.....not much excitement here......yet.........

Swelling, swelling and more swelling....

Well as the title says I am swelling!!! Mostly in my right leg still, but it is my whole leg now and not just my ankle. The other leg is starting to swell too, but not like the right one. My hands get so swollen that I can't pick anything up without usually dropping it like six times before I get a firm grip. And when I wake up my face is swollen. All of this is concerning my family because they all say it's not normal, even my sister-in-law who's an RN. But my docs office seems to kind of blow it off. I think they think I am just a nervous first time mom. The thing is, I get sick when I lay down, I feel like I can't breathe, the leg is starting to have a burning sensation.....I don't think it's normal. I have an appointment tommorow so I am going to try to put my foot down, lol, if it's not too swollen...... I am just tired of not being listened too, especially being a first time mom. Well enough of that.......
Today will be spent trying to get all those last minute things done.....hospital bag packed, baby's bag packed, car seat put in car, bassinet set up in bedroom, baby's room completely stocked with freshly washed clothes and blankets and bibs, writing out a plan of action and phone numbers for when I go into labor......on top of getting my house cleaned. Thankfully hubby is here to help. The other day we spent all day working. I washed 3 loads of baby laundry, sterelized all the bottles and pacifiers, got everything out of boxes and put in organizational patterns in the baby's room. Meanwhile Tim is the master at putting all things together, except the pack-n-play which we can't get to stand up for anything. I remember Aidan's being difficult to set up too, and this is the same brand so I think we just need some practice at getting the right technique down........
Christmas was nice. It was very low-key this year. Just us, my sister and her two youngest, and my parents and foster brothers, plus a family friend. It didn't really feel like Christmas this year. I don't know why. Maybe because I am just so pre-occupied with the baby. Christmas morning was nice, my husband and I got up at 9....gotta do it while we can....lol....(even though I can't really sleep anyways anymore,)......and made coffee. We opened gifts under the tree. He really spoiled me this year, he got me a replica old radio that plays records, cds, and tapes, plus has a radio, and it has it's own stand. It looks like something from the 40's. Then he got me a cashmere sweater, a gift certificate for an auto detailing, and the first three seasons of Facts of Life, and 80's show I love. Plus some other good stuff. He was good to me. I spoiled him too though. We were both marveling at the fact that next year it will be all about the baby. Hard to believe things will change so soon. I don't know how I can wrap my mind around it. Now that the baby is coming, I would like to start the tradition of reading the Christmas story from Mathew or Luke, on Christmas Eve every year, after all that is truely what we are celebrating!!!!
Well I suppose this is a long enough post.......I better stop now, lol......

Edit:I went to the docs and it seems they might actually listen to me for once. I am having two tests done for pre-eclampsia, one a blood test and the other a 24-hour test which I won't go into details. Anyways I will find out Friday and we will see from there......

White Christmas

I am really dreaming of a White Christmas.....we have a teeny tiny bit on the ground but that's about it. I hate no snow on Christmas, I am praying for a Christmas miracle of snow...lol......Anyways yesterday I traveled to Syracuse with my sister who will remain nameless since she doesn't want me to share her life anymore......I got the best coat rack at the Christmas Tree shop. I went with unamed sister to her appointment for cosmetology school. They start classes every month. I am seriously thinking about doing it myself after the baby is born. I am not quite sure yet. Something to pray about. It's in Syracuse so that would be 4 hours driving time a day, but I would meet my sister at her place and drive half of the way with her so it wouldn't be so bad. Plus my mom could watch the baby, and there's not any one else I would really trust to watch him or her. We will see. I am going to pray about it and so is Tim. It would be a sacrifice, but after 9 months I would have a career. Something to think about.
Anyways I got home yesterday and put my leftovers from Friendly's down for a second to bring something upstairs. They were in a styrofoam box and a plastic Friendly's bag. I ended up talking with Tim for like 10 minutes when I realized I had left them down on the floor. When I came down, my dog Roxy had the bag torn into little tiny bits, and there were little tiny bits of styrofoam everywhere, and she had half of my chicken caesar wrap, which I had only taken like 3 bites out of, and most of my fries. I almost killed her!!! There went 8 bucks down the drain. I couldn't eat much at lunch time and I was saving it for dinner. Needless to say I had canned soup. She hasn't done anything like that in a long time though, so I was a little surprised. Oh well, what are you going to do, dogs will be dogs.
My cat has not touched my tree!!! I am in shock!!!
Well not much else going on....gearing up for Christmas, which I can't believe is almost here. It doesn't feel like Christmas to me. I am hoping that changes because it is my favorite time of year. We will spend the evening of Christmas Eve with Tim's side of the family, and then drive back that night to be home for our own Christmas in the morning. Yesterday I got Tim something he will never expect, I don't want to put it on here because sometimes he reads this. He's having an awful time shopping for me because he can't get me any clothes!!! Oh well....lol....in case I don't get on again.....Merry Christmas!!!!!

God's Amazing Care

It always blesses me when I see God' hand in something. You know how God protects us even when we don't know it?? Well last night He let us know of His protection. My sister had my foster brother Jeremy spend the night last night as a last minute sort of thing. He likes to come help her out with the kids. Well at midnight last night, Jeremy was sleeping on the couch in the playroom downstairs and he heard noise so he turned the playroom light on and went into the bathroom that is in the playroom, turned the light on, and saw a man coming in the window. The man's leg was through the window and all Jer saw was a white sweatshirt, and he said the man was breathing heavy. What's funny is that even though Jeremy looks like he is 12, the guy was scared off. God put Jeremy there at that moment, to prevent something bad from happening. To me that is so amazing. Of course I am still utterly freaked out and worried about my sister and her family, but God has shown His protection and I know I have to trust that He will continue to protect. There have been a ton of burglaries in her area lately, they have been all over the paper and news here. I don't know what that man's intent was, but if Jer hadn't been there.....I don't even want to think about it. My sister Ruth lives in an apartment right down a short way behind Tracey's, and that scares me too. I don't feel safe for either of them where they live. When the police came they saw that the man had cut the screen to her window. My sister Ruth said she saw fingerprints, but I don't think the police fingerprinted it. Which in my opinion they should, but maybe I have just been watching too much CSI....lol. I am just praying this guy and other people who are doing these break-ins, get caught. There has been a whole rash of them. A man and his wife in a neighboring town, caught two guys last week, and the wife scared them off with a shotgun!!! I think it's a gang full of them, because there is just too many break-ins. Plus last week Tracey called me at 3am because the burglar alarm next door was going off and she thought someone was in her house then. I don't know.....but I am so glad we have a God that loves us, and protects us, and keeps us from things that are harmful and scary. I would just ask that anyone who reads this would just pray for continued protection of my family. I KNOW God is protecting us. He is so awesome!!!

Random Thoughts

Some facts about me:
I meticulously scrape the pulpy part off of an orange with a knife, but love pulp in my orange juice....go figure.
I love antiques and silent films.
I like doing woodsy things like camping, even though I am a girlie girl.
I would love to never have to do my hair or makeup ever again!!!
I have a hard time saying no to people.
I got "saved," when I was five.
I am constantly dropping things, running into things, spilling things on myself, and basically being an all around klutz.....especially now.

Well that's about all I can think of for the random thoughts. I guess I don't think too much!!! LOL!!! Anyways our bed and breakfast weekend was very nice. I got a new winter coat that of course I can't button now, but will wear nevertheless. And Tim got rest which he really needed. He took two days off work this week to paint the baby's room, which I am happy to say is almost done!!! And today he is taking Vader to get his shots so we can get him neutered in a couple of weeks, yea!!!! And most importantly my sister had a blessing, which I knew she would because God always provides.....she is going to school for cosmetology at a very good school in Syracuse, and she gets a full grant for it. Not only that but umemployment will pay her through her whole schooling, and Mom and I will still have a job through the state.....so God is awesome!!! I still have not heard from my friend Elyse, getting slightly worried about her!!! Oh and Jackie, if you read this, I tried to comment on your blog, but for some reason it didn't let me!!! Uggghh.....

Forgetful

I can't believe in my last post I forgot to mention that I am out of a job!!! Not by my sister's choice, they fired her. Yes the jerks fired her after two years of an outstanding work record, saying that she didn't have the experience they were looking for. Ha!!!! Aparently it takes two years for them to decide that. What really happened is that my poor niece is sick all the time and they didn't want to deal with Tracey having to take care of her....even though they knew she was a single mom from the beginning and told her they would work with her, that they were family friendly. They basically brought her in the office and condescendingly "let her go." And they had the nerve to ask her to train the girl that is taking her place!!! And it's Christmas and they did this to someone!!! The only reason Tracey is doing the training is because they told her they would give her a severance package and a good letter of recommendation if she did..........AUGGGHHHHH!!!! What is this world coming to??? So inadvertantly, my mom and I are out of a job too until Tracey gets a new one, which I am believing God will bless her mightly and give her what she rightly deserves!!!! I was depending on this month's paycheck to get us through when the baby is first born. I wasn't sure if I was going to be working or not afterward, but I am pretty sure that financially I won't have a choice. The thing that stinks is Tim and I booked a bed and breakfast package for this weekend because it's our anniversary, and it's not refundable. I wouldn't have booked it had I known I was going to have my job ended abruptly!!! Oh well.....I guess God wanted us to go to get away. And besides, we know He works all things together for His good, no matter what the situation. So I know that this will work out somehow to, not just for me but for my mom and Tracey.
On another note, I am feeling much better, other than this head crud that they won't give me antibiotics for (they are insisting it's a viral sinus infection, even though it's been 2 months.) But the swelling seems to be going down. I honestly think I did have something and that God healed me because it was really bad and after being prayed for by some women in the church and other friends who found out, the swelling has gradually decreased. So thank you Lord!!!
On yet another note, my Christmas things are finally all up and looking lovely thanks to the help of my hubby and a dear friend who helped me (okay she did most of it,) with my tree. We were hoping the cat wouldn't attack it, and it seemed he was doing well, we sprayed him with water each time he went near it, and that seemed to be working. The only problem is when we are sleeping at night. We woke up this morning and there were ornaments on the floor. This is after I bought him the MacDaddy of cat towers that cost an arm and a leg. We are probably going to have to have someone stay here in order to watch him while we are gone this weekend. He has his shots and check-up tommorow and then he will have an appointment to be neutered. We are going to see how he is after that, and if we see that he's still going to be wild once in a while(cuz he doesn't do it that often....) we will have to start trying to find a home again. Now that I have some ideas thanks to Jackie about how to do that if I need to!!! Well I guess that is it for now. Elyse if you ever read this anymore, please contact me I am worried about you!!!

Things

Edit: The doc says I am okay, although I am thinking my ankle swelling is not normal still, but she's the expert. She said that my two-month long headache and the pain through my right leg is probably from back issues caused by the baby. She said to do some excersizes that she gave me as well as wear support socks. So I will try it. She did say that if I got really sick to certainly come in again if it gets worse. But she seemed to think it was normal swelling so I will take her word for it. I really think the prayers that people prayed prevented it from being toxemia, so thank you all who prayed. Well I am off to put my feet up!!!!

Well my swelling has increased immensly, especially in my right leg. My right leg feels kind of numb and I am having swelling in my hands and face. My sister-in-law is an RN and she said it sounds like pre-eclampsia, so first thing in the morning I am going to call my doctor and try to get in or else go to the emergency room. I don't want to chance anything happening with the baby. I know some swelling is normal, but everyone that has had children and looked at it says it doesn't look normal. I guess we shall see. My mom is super worried, she's called me like ten times, and been like, "I think you should go now." Well I think I will be okay till the morning. Anyways I am trusting God that it will all work out okay.
On other notes, I have finally gotten all the things for the baby, now we just have to get the room together. Everything else I ordered from the bedding, to the changing table/dresser, to the wall border, are all here. I am only missing two things and they are supposed to be getting taken care of. But for the most part I am not too worried. Tim is getting the room painted tommorow, hopefully, if everything is okay with my doctors appointment. And then I can get things put away.....well not much else, my life is pretty boring right now.........lol......

Fluid, Lack of Sleep, and other Mundane Things

Well when people complained about having extra fluid or water weight in their bodies, I never quite understood why that was a problem, other than maybe being a little uncomfortable. Now I realize it is actually painful. I took my wedding rings off about two weeks ago. I should have done it sooner but I was reluctant to for obvious reasons. Now my hands and feet feel weird. I am thinking it must be similar to what arthritis feels like. I am not able to move my hands well, like opening and shutting, etc. And occasionally it hurts. But I will deal with it, after all it is only temporary right??
The thing I am having a hard time with is sleep. For some reason whenever I lay down I feel like I am going to pass out. It feels like no oxygen is getting to my head, or like someone has their hands around my neck. My mom thinks it is a blood pressure issue. I am going to talk to my doctor next week when I have an appointment, because it's getting pretty bad, and I can't sleep, therefore I can't really function as a normal human being!!!
Today I am going to decorate my tree. It's standing right now, crooked, because this house is insanely crooked. The cat is sitting under it right now. I swear if he even trys to destroy it this year.........I don't know but it won't be pretty!!!! We have an appointment for his shots and then they said after they see him we can finally get him neutered. Yea!!!!! So I am hoping that will cause him some distraction from the tree. My main concern is when the baby comes, and is trying to learn to crawl or anything like that. I am afraid he might see a moving target and run for it. We are hoping if we neuter him that will help. Unfortuneately everywhere I have turned to find him a home has not worked. I even contacted the Humane Society about 2 months ago and they supposedly put me on a list and I haven't heard back from them. At this point with how much we love him, because he has turned into a very sweet cat, we will only send him somewhere where we know they will take care of him. I have been seriously praying on the issue, which sounds funny, but I need all the help I can get!!!
Well off to start my day...........

Thankful

Things I am thankful for......the obvious.....my baby. My husband Tim. My family. My dog Roxy and my cat Vader. My house/heat/electric/food and clothing/a hot shower/a nice bed to sleep in. Two cars. The fact that everything I need for the baby is pretty much bought and paid for by other people who have blessed us immensly. Friends. Jobs that are keeping bills and other things taken care of. The fact that my husband brought me home tickets to Stars on Ice in Lake Placid on Saturday. A church family I love and who blesses us. And most importantly, my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.....who gave the ultimate gift by dieing for me. And if I was the only person on earth, He still would have done it. That's so much to be thankful for that I can't even fathom it.
In this season of give me, give me, give me, I want to remember all the things I have and all the things I am blessed with. When I think about how other people live in this world, and even in this country, I realize that what I have is a whole lot, and what I want is just icing on the cake. All those wants and desires are fine in measure, but I need to remember what I have. Cuz it's a whole lot.......Thank You Lord for all I have.......

Second Shower

So my second shower was Saturday. It was very nice, my two sister-in-laws, and step-mom-in-law threw it for me. I was very blessed between both of my showers. I pretty much have everything I need except for my stroller/car seat combo and my swing. But both of those items we think we are getting from other people. I actually found a crib too!!! And now I have a changing table/dresser combo that we plan on getting, care of my in-laws. Pretty much Tim and I won't have to buy much, it is such a blessing. Only two months to go. I can't believe it, it seems like a whirl-wind between all the time we were trying to get pregnant and now....two months from now I will be a mom. That blows my mind. I have to admit I am apprehensive. I don't know how anything is going to be and that freaks me out a little. But marriage freaked me out and I adjusted to that, and so I think this will be the same. I will get the hang of it!! It's just the thought that I will be responsible for this little one for the rest of my life. That's enough to freak anyone out!!! LOL!!! Everyone is weighing in on (no pun intended,) what I am having, a boy or a girl. I really am not sure one way or another. There's some things that make me think I am having a boy, and some things that make me think I am having a girl. I guess it will really be a surprise. I have no idea either way.
I am looking forward to Thursday, my brother and his family are coming. Usually we don't have a lot of holidays with him, so I am happy. They haven't seen me since August so I am sure they will be surprised by my belly. I have only gained 12 pounds so far, so I am doing really well. I am sure that number will increase over the next two months. Well I am tired....what else is new....hope all are well!!!

Rain

Now I understand why people get depressed in the winter.....it has been dark and gray for like a week, no sunshine. It really does a number on you to not feel that precious warmth and light rain down on you. It makes me think of when I get busy and don't have time for God. I feel so disconnected and worn. And then when I am in His presence and allowing Him to move in me and do what HE wants instead of what I want.....I feel that warmth and the flow of His Spirit all over again. And I wonder why I let my life get so busy that I didn't have time for Him, and I wonder how I lived without that light in my life. Just like when spring comes. At the first sign of sunshine, I wonder how I lived without it all those dark months of winter. Just something I was thinking about this morning.
On another note, my sister's trial ended up not being a trial. They settled for now, and although it's not a perfect solution, we are just trusting God will keep the promises we as a family have recieved and that she herself has recieved. I have peace about it. I know God will protect my niece and nephew.
Tommorow is my second baby shower. Hopefully after this we can get the baby's room whipped into shape. We still haven't painted it, but I think having all the stuff will be a good motivator for my husband!!! I can't believe Thanksgiving is next week. Talk about the holidays sneaking up on you. We are doing Thanksgiving at my sister's house. This year my brother Kevin will be there which is nice because I only see him like twice a year. I am sad Britany won't be there, but she usually isn't anyways because she would go to her dad's or to friend's houses. I haven't seen her in a year, and really talked to her in almost two years. It really hurts. I guess it's just another one of those things to trust God on:) Well I hope anyone who reads this has a blessed weekend......

Lazy Day, and Random Things

Edit: If anyone happens to read this on Monday the 13th by or at 9AM, please pray for my family, it is my sister's trial and it's very important. Thank you!!!


Well today I just decided to be lazy. I have done really absolutely nothing. I was going to do my hair and makeup, but I figured, what was the point, I am not going anywhere!!! Today is my day off so I guess I have the right to be lazy right?? I am usually using my days off to clean, or do some kind of errands, or go to docs appointments. So I just decided today was going to be a rest day. And I know I need to do it while I can because pretty soon my life won't just be about me anymore!!! LOL!!! Anyways so I have done nothing.
I have a slight crib issue. My inlaws called me and told me they were going to get us our crib. The problem is though, they went to get my crib I wanted off of the registry, which also comes with the dresser and changing table, and the company wanted to charge them a ridiculous ammount of money for shipping. So they want me to pick out a different crib. I have no problem with that, but then I am still left with the dresser and the changing table, which are pretty much going to be pretty expensive for both. I want new, so that complicates things. I know I could get some used stuff in really good condition, but since this is my first baby, I really want to get new. My bassinet isn't new though. But it's like a classic one, so I couldn't resist it. And I have a ton of clothing and other cool things that are used that people gave me. But for the big stuff, I really want something I can have for all my children, and have it be something only my family has used. I don't know what I will get yet, or how I will work it out, but I know God will help us have all we need. I am the type that doesn't need a fancy smancy set so I think I can get what I need relatively cheap.....we will see!!!
I hate that Christmas stuff is already out. It's so ridiculous that we are getting targeted earlier and earlier every year. Before you know we will have to endure Christmas ads in May!!! I mean come on, the evil holiday wasn't even done with yet and they were spewing out Christmas ads. And to top that off, they completely skip over Thanksgiving, which is a holiday about giving thanks for what you have, instead of a holiday(Christmas), they've turned into how much can I get for myself.....ugghhhh.....I hate it. And of course there is no room for Jesus in the "Holiday," campaigns....cuz you know, the "holidays," it's not "Christmas," anymore, just don't have room for him. I have just determined that Tim and I are going to not try to outdo ourselves this year. Everything is going to be kept to a minimal. After all, I don't think Jesus would be too sad if we didn't go out of our way to spend over our means!!!! Well I guess I am done ranting.....that's the most I've done today!!!

Clutter Part 2

Well my clutter is getting under control finally!!! Tim and I spent quite a few hours in the baby's room Saturday. We got rid of a lot junk out of that room!!!! Also we packed away some old mementos and a huge carton of my books....I still have books stored in two different friend's attics.....I must have like 500 I think!!!! There is still a ton to do, but I feel so much better getting SOMETHING done. Tim got sick of looking at the ugly sunflower border, and tore it down while we were working....YEA!!!!! Believe me, it was nasty.
I am feeling overwhelmed because we have the paint, and cabinet handles to do our kitchen, and we have no time. We have the paint to do our dressers.....no time......and we of course first and foremost importantly, we have to paint the baby's room. Other people would have had that done a looonnnnnngggg time ago. I just can't believe how much of our lives are taken up with work and obligations. Sometimes it can seem so overwhelming. I just feel like I can't get anything done...I mean I have the stuff....just no time....to do it!!! Oh well....
On other news, my sister's court date is on Monday, the 13th.....if anyone reads this please keep it in prayer, we are believing for a victory!!! Also still keep my niece Brittany in prayer as she is set on marrying this punk who turned her away from God. UGGGHHHH!!!
Well I am off to clean, what else is new......Have a blessed day!!!

Nothing New Under the Sun

Well not much here. Just bored. I am having my little moment of time while Kiersten and Aidan are coloring. The other kids will be home shortly. I spent the better part of the morning cleaning the upstairs in my sister's house because the kids totally trashed it last night. I don't mind helping my sister out, I know she doesn't have a lot of time to do that kind of stuff. I will probably babysit tommorow, making this a three-day week. Which doesn't sound like a lot, but it is when you're pregnant. I am sure next time I am pregnant and it is my own children, I will be more accustomed to it, but for now, I like my days off!!! LOL!!! I gotta enjoy them while I can right?? I am a little freaked out about this whole baby-supposed-to-be-moving-ten-times-an-hour thing. They told me that's how much the baby should be moving every hour, and I definitely don't think that happens. The baby moves a lot, but I don't know if it's ten times. I try to count, but I don't think I am doing it right!!! Oh well. I am trusting God for a happy, healthy baby.
I had lunch with a good friend yesterday and had some good conversation. She very much amazes me with her uplifting courage. I know it is through God's grace, but she still has to make the choice to be positive in a situation that's heartbreaking, and to me that's very courageous.....I love my friends!!! God bless all!!!!

Shower

Well my baby shower was Saturday. It was fun and I got quite a few things. I like whoever came up with the tradition of people throwing you a party and giving you free stuff!!! That's a great tradition!!! But seriously I am thankful. I have awesome friends and church members and family members. I got my playpen off of my registry care of Heather and her two sister-in-laws and mother-in-law. And then I got a very chic diaper bag and a bouncy seat from my other friend Heather. And my Mom purchased my high chair. And my sister got me this cool bouncy rocker thing that turns into a rocker for a toddler. Plus the normal little baby odds and ends. I have another shower on November 18 with Tim's side of the family. It won't be as big as this one was. Tim's Mom is in Colorado so she won't be able to come, and his oldest sister as well, although I doubt she would come anyways.....long story. Hopefully I will get some more of the bigger items I need, not that I am selfish, I am just worried about not having that stuff. But my God shall supply all of my needs right!!!
We had guest ministry yesterday at church and a fellowship dinner afterwards. He talked about disapointments robbing your joy, and not really knowing who you are in Christ. Because if Christians aren't comfortable with who they are in Christ, how are they going to witness to others? He also talked about losing hope, and how that keeps us as Christians from fighting the fight. It sounds so simple, but it refreshed me. With the trial for my sister and a million other things coming up, I have had so much burden and stress upon me. I felt so hopeless and like things were never going to go our way. But I was reminded, duh, that God is bigger than these circumstances, and if I don't fight with prayer and lose my hope and faith, then the Enemy has already won. So I have a fresh outlook on the whole situation. Plus my sister recieved an awesome word that starting January 1 it was going to be a whole new year, not just on the calendar, but that she was going to be victorious and that what satan has robbed, God is going to replace. It was awesome, and I am sure it encouraged her, but it encouraged me as well. When darkness comes in like a flood, the battle belongs to the Lord!!!!
Hope you all are well!!!

Bored

I am bored. Actually this is a brief moment before two more rugrats are in my charge....home from school. In the mornings it's just me and Aidan now. Then at 2:30pm I get Kiersten back from preschool. Now I wait for the other two, who do not get home until close to 4pm. So for now I have a brief moment. Not much new here. I can see the baby moving now, not just feel it. I don't know if I wrote that before or not. He or she is moving a lot more lately too, which is a good thing. I still feel completely unprepared. I don't think I will ever be prepared. I am worried about all sorts of things, but I guess God will guide me along the way!!
My shower is this weekend. I should say my first shower...Tim's family is throwing me one later, I have no clue when, sometime in November. I still don't have anything done in the baby's room. I am feeling quite overwhelmed about that, but I know it will all come together. I told you not much is new here...what a boring post. Goes well with the title. Oh well.....

Sleep....or Lack Thereof

I am soooooo tired. I mean the tiredest I have ever been in my life. I simply cannot sleep. I haven't been able to for a while, and this weekend it's been super-compounded because I have had Kiersten and Aidan since Friday morning. My sister is with my parents in Pittsburgh for special church meetings at a pastor friends' of ours. The first night, Aidan woke up at 4am for an hour and half. And then last night he woke up crying, every single hour, on the hour, after falling asleep at almost 11pm.....and I didn't fall asleep till one. And our fire siren in town went off, with a succession of loud sirens flying past our main street. So needless to say.....I am just super exhausted.....and I just found out I am going to have these two another night because my sister won't be getting in until midnight.....UGGGHHHHH!!!! All work and no sleep makes Kathy a crazy pregnant woman!!!!
On another note, I can't wait until next weekend because it's my baby shower!!! YEA!!!! I can't wait to get them (I will have two) over with. Only because I just want to get everything ready. I think my nesting instinct is kicking in early...I am going crazy trying to get stuff ready. I don't think I ever will be. Oh well. Well not much excitement here.....just no sleep.......God Bless!!!

Things

Well I never did get to the "clutter," I last posted about. Things seem to happen every time I have a plan to tackle something!!! I did however, get into the baby's room a little bit on Tuesday, so I got some stuff accomplished. Hopefully more today....I am writing this on my new laptop.....yes new laptop. My hubby (and God of course,) has blessed me with one because I really want to write my book, and this way I can wherever I go. It is something I have wanted to do for like ever and I feel I have been called to do through prophecy. I didn't get a fancy smancy laptop though. It's just a basic one, very good, a Gateway, but we got a great deal on it.....only$400. It was $200 off the original price. And we had to work to get it, just like anything in life!!! The store was advertising it, and we said we would like it, and the employee informed us that there were no more. We were like, if you're advertising it and there are no more, you should give us the floor model. And they were like, we can't do that.....some policy.....yadayadayada.......and finally the manager did give it to us. But they had to erase all their store stuff off of it. So the tech who does that, goes to reformat the thing, and all the discs and drivers for this computer were missing......so in short they didn' t have what they needed for it. They had to contact Gateway and get everything, so I didn' t get the laptop until Monday, after paying for it Saturday. But here it is, and it's mine, and God is good. I can't believe the blessing He has outpoured on Tim and I. Exactly two years ago, Tim had a prophecy about not being afraid to step out into business. Both of us didn't know exactly what that meant at the time, but here we are now, with Tim shooting, editing, and producing weddings and big projects. And he's getting a good reputation, because frankly, and I don't mean to brag, his work is quite good. Good enough to land a job with the local AMF Bowling factory, and The Children's Clinic. God has indeed blessed us!!!! Department heads in Albany have seen his video for the Children's Clinic and are really impressed. That's pretty huge. Well I won't yack anymore. Hope anyone who reads this is well!!!
P.S. Loving my Tide pen!!! It has gotten a myriad of things out of my clothing instantly. I love it, you should get one!!!! Free advertising for Tide, yea!!!!

Clutter

I was just talking to a friend about clutter. I am so irritated with the clutter in my house. We have rooms that have been cluttered since we moved in a year ago!!! UggGGhhhHHH!!!! I have been throwing out stuff and donating stuff to thrift stores, but it seems we keep accumulating more and more. Frustrating. Today after a quick errand at church I am going to attempt to clean the room that will be the baby's room so we can paint it tommorow. My husband has been up to his ears in editing projects and I hardly see him anymore, so this will be a nice time. Although he will have to do most of the work because of obvious reasons. There are various people who are complaining about not being able to get ahold of us, and if they knew all the things going on I think they would realize it's been almost impossible for Tim and I to even see or talk to eachother. I literally only have the two hours of driving with him a day, when I work. Because we carpool. When I am not working I don't even have that time with him. He took on a lot of editing projects, other than his normal job, so we would have fuel oil and money for the baby. Because I obviously can't work right away, or possibly at all, after the baby is born. He is stretching himself pretty thin, and it worries me because I am worried about him not getting enough sleep, etc.....but I know he is making a huge sacrifice for the benefit of our family. And quite frankly that makes me love him more!!!
Anyways I am still asking for prayers for my sister and Kiersten and Aidan, as well as my parents and my niece Britany. My parents were just terminated as supervisors for the visitations. This is a huge blow to us. The drug adict's family is now in control. It seems he keeps getting more and more. We aren't sure what we as a family, can do legally to try and help. But like I said before. God is bigger. As scared out of my mind I am for the kids, I have to trust that God will protect them, and that the plans of the enemy will be foiled. Every day I am aware that I have to be proactive in my prayers to fight this battle. It's not just my sister being attacked, it is our whole family. I don't know what I would do if anything happened to those kids. But again, that's where trusting God comes in. It's very scary, but the battle belongs to the Lord. And I appreciate any prayers.....Thank you so much for them!!!!
Well off to remove "clutter"..........

Kids I Love

So the kids I love, well some of the kids I love, are safe this weekend, thanks to lots of prayers. However a lot more are needed because worse things are brewing. Kiersten and Aidan's father is ruthless in his quest to do whatever it is he is planning, and quite frankly, it's scary. I know people don't really know this situation, but if anyone is reading this, I just ask for prayer. The law guardian, the person who works the visitation for the court, is seemingly out to get my sister. She is trying to terminate my parents as Supervisors for visitation, and she is trying to get it so the "father," can have vacation with the kids, completely unsupervised. This man is a coke addict, a wife abuser, and we only can imagine what else.....but God is bigger than him. So I am just asking for prayers for my nieces and nephews, and prayers for my sister, and my parents......because we really need protection and some heavenly warfaring angels. I know my God is in control. But prayers are severly appreciated......Thanks.....

Decorating

So I finally have the stuff to do the baby's room. We are doing a safari/Noah's Ark theme. I was going to do Care Bears but Tim says that if we have a boy that that's not manly enough. Anyways I like the Biblical theme behind the Noah's Ark better. We have a border that has purple and blue and yellow and green and some other colors, and it has lions and elephants and giraffes and koala bears. And then we got these little wallpaper cut outs that have those animals plus palm trees. We can use those to make a lamp or put on the dresser to customize it. Then we got a yellow cream color for the wall. It's going to be super cute. Now if I can only get all the junk out of there to organize it!!!
We also purchase paint for our kitchen. We are doing the cabinets a white, and putting new nickel polished handles and hinges on them. Then the walls which are like wood planks, will be a dusky blue, like a cottagy sort of look. We are looking into a new countertop as well, and eventually we need to get an updated dishwasher, just for looks cuz ours works fine, but it's like from the 80's. We are also looking into tiling the floor because we have carpet, yes I said carpet, in our kitchen.
So that's what I have to be excited about right now.
To not be excited about....My Grandpa had a stroke. By the grace of God he was already in the hospital for a routine procedure, and they caught it before it paralized him. Thank you Lord. Also my sister needs immense prayer because her abusive, drug-using, violent ex-husband, gets Aidan and Kiersten, UNSUPERVISED, this weekend. And he is capable of anything, and when I say anything, I mean anything. So please keep that in your prayers.......
Other than that, I am just thankful I have a God who loves me and never fails me, I know through all these trials, He is in control......on to cleaning for the day. Story of my life.....lol.

Angry

I am really angry. I am angry that Satan seems to think he is going to rob my family. Yesterday I discovered how far gone my niece Britany really is. She went from having the most amazing faith and spirit....to being this 17-year old punk who ran away from home, dresses skanky, and uses her myspace to bash our entire family AND Christians, whom she claims are "fanatical." This is the same girl who told me that her dream was to be a missionary and bring Christ to others and that she thought being martyred for your faith was cool because it meant that you really loved God and that He sacrificed for us so we should sacrifice for Him. All because of some cult-leader-like guy who has her so twisted.....My heart was in anguish when I discovered how decieved and how different she is. Her website bashes my brother and his wife who rose out of the ashes of being teenage parents to become an RN and a Humane Officer, and have set a standard of Christ in their home. The website is also full of language, which she never swore, and her wearing sleazy outfits. Not to mention the tirade against all of us "fanatics." It's just so not Britany. I couldn't believe it was the same person. And I didn't realize how severly changed she was. It has really affected me. I am just so sick and tired of quality youth being robbed. Satan's goal is to rob, kill, steal, and destroy, the Bible says so. But I am not going to sit by and let this happen to my family. I have the weapons of warfare, the weapons given my by my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and by the power of His Holy Spirit. The Bible says, "No weapon formed against you shall prosper...." And this weapon against my family will not prosper. My niece is not lost to the other side, she will come back.
I ask that anyone who reads this, please keep Britany in your prayers. Please pray that the deception would be lifted from her and that she would hear God's voice calling her. I appreciate anyone's prayers for this difficult situation.

Stubborn!!!

Well I either have the most stubborn or the most modest child!!! I am preferring the last cuz I don't think calling the baby stubborn is very nice!!! But anyways....Baby Owens will have to be called Baby Owens until he/she is born because he/she simply would not cooperate!!! We could not find out what the sex was!!! Oh well, I waited 4 years, I can wait 4 months....I am happy I have a healthy little one, that's what is most important. Now I guess I will have to do a neutral colored nursery. I think we will probably do a Noah's ark theme. I like the Biblical aspect of that anyways. I registered the other day at Walmart, I figured there was no point in waiting anymore!!! There's not too much neutral stuff, but I will find something somewhere. Well that is about it for my update, not too much exciting.......

I'm Alive

I haven't updated in a bit although I don't think it matters much cuz I think this is pretty much just me reading this here!!! Anyways....Baby Owens did not cooperate for my second ultrasound. The tech felt so bad for me that instead of doing a dvd that I paid for, that day, she scheduled it for tommorow so I have one more chance of finding out what the baby is. And I don't believe it's just cuz God doesn't want me to know....I don't think He is that cruel!!! LOL!!!! Anyways we shall see, I am not putting my hopes on it.
We took little Baby Owens to his/her first Yankee game. We went to Toronto on Tuesday, and proceeded to look everywhere for a hotel, which I told my Dad that we should have booked ahead of time, did he listen, noooooooo. So we drove around for almost two hours looking before the game, and finally like 15 minutes from the stadium, found a Super 8, which was NOT my ideal place to stay....every good hotel was booked. But I am thankful anyways because it was an adventure. That night we got to see the Yankees beat the Blue Jays, in a somewhat subdued ballpark. Toronto fans don't really get into their games, you just can't beat Yankee stadium and the atmosphere....our fans are serious and intense!!! We had pretty good seats, got lots of zoomed in footage of my favorite Yankees.....but still didn't get to meet Derek Jeter....oh darn!!!! Anyways it was nice, the CN tower rose above the stadium, it added a nice touch. The next day we went to the Eaton Centre which is a 7,000 something square foot mall. I go to a huge Canadian mall, only to buy from Motherhood Maternity which we have right here in the States.....oh well.....LOL!!!! All the maternity jeans ranged from 39.99 up past 100.00......no way I was buying those!!!!
So here I am home today, looking forward to an exciting day of cleaning.....woo hoo.....I hope I can get this house in shape, we haven't even touched the nursery........I am going to try to post some pictures later!!!!

Today

As most Americans I am distinctly aware that today marks the anniversary of a day that changed our scope of things forever. I won't go into a big long thing, other than to say, that I hope everyone is praying for those who were directly affected, and those who are currently fighting for the safety of our nation, such as Staff Sgt. Andre McKenzie, and Billy Browning, and Gregory Stafford and Tim Cline. I pray that all those who sacrificed and all those who continue to sacrifice, will be blessed and kept safe. And I pray that our nation will be safe.
On another note....Thank God for school starting!!! LOL!!! I am down to one child for most of the day!!! How much of a piece of cake will that be!!! It is joyous and wonderful.....
God Bless and God Bless America, America....Bless God!!!

Weekend

Well this holiday weekend was certainly busy. After helping Tim's mom all day Saturday and not getting home until midnight, because we stopped at Target and to eat my birthday dinner, I was ready for some fun!!!! My birthday was pretty uneventful in the way that it was just moving stuff and cleaning, but I did have a little scare. The day before and the day of I was having a lot of pain in my lower abdomen. So much so I called my doctor because at some points it was doubling me over. I got the midwife on call and she told me to lay down for an hour and drink a lot of water. I did that and called her back, and I was feeling somewhat better. She said she thought I just overdid it over the weekend and pulled some muscles. I think she was right because I have continually felt better, thank you Lord!!!
On Sunday we headed to Saranac Lake with RJay and Heather. We checked into the Hotel Saranac and Tim and I went to a play at the Pendragon Theater. Arsenic and Old Lace. It was really a great performance, nothing cheesy or small town about it. I was delightfully surprised. Tim enjoyed it too. We are already talking about going back for their Christmas play. The next day we got up and had a nice breakfast and headed out to Lake Placid where we proceeded to shop!!! Heather got her fill of the Gap outlet, which I got some stuff that actually fits me being pregnant. And I was able to find a 1930's Bulova watch, for only $40. It works and is in very nice condition. It fits my wrist perfect too....it was meant for me!!! Usually these watches sell for like $100 and up, so this was a great find!!!!
All in all it was a very nice mini-vacation. Now I have to clean all this clutter in my house from stuff Tim's mother has given us, to various items acquired in our travels. I hate unpacking, uggghhhhh!!!!!

Bored

I am so bored right now. I am at Tim's mom's right now, we are packing her whole house up to be moved to Colorado. I can't really do a ton in my posistion!!! So I am feeling rather unuseful right now. Tommorow is my birthday but I don't think it's going to be very exciting. Cleaning and helping finishing up packing. Then going home. Not much birthday excitement there. I don't really care though, because we are going to Lake Placid on Sunday and that will be fun. I am so bored that this is a very boring post!!! Oh well. Tim's mom is supposed to do my hair tonight but I don't think that's going to happen with all the stuff going on. I was really looking forward to it, I wanted some highlights and a slightly different cut. Oh well. I am so bored. I guess nothing else is going on. Ta ta for now!!!!

Oh Just Stuff

Not too much exciting going on. I have been extremely busy though. I babysat Wed-Friday last week and then held a porch sale Saturday. I was helped by the lovely Heather. She managed to make a whole $5.75!!!! I only made like $24, and my mother, who wasn't even there, managed to make over $50!!! But it was fun to be with my friend!! Then Sunday we were going to hold the sale again but it rained. So instead we had lunch with RJay and Heather and then later on made a fire and ate smores down by the river in our town. So lots of Heather time this weekend!!! And we will be spending more time together this upcoming weekend. Tim's mother and stepfather are moving to Colorado on Saturday, which happens to be my 27th birthday, and we will be down in Syracuse helping them from Thursday on, and then on Sunday after church, we are heading to Lake Placid for the night. RJay and Heather will be joining us!!! We are actually spending Sunday night in Saranac Lake and then spending the day in Placid on Monday. Tim and I will be going to a play on Sunday night. It will be a rendition of Arsenic and Old Lace. I can't wait, I haven't seen a play in a long time. Plus all those shops in Lake Placid!!! Not that many of them sell maternity clothes.......oh well. There are antique shops so I look forward to those.
On baby news, this kid is moving around constantly now. It is the most surreal feeling to feel a living thing moving inside of you. I can't even begin to explain. I have been feeling it for a while but now it is getting more intense. So much so, that Tim actually felt it kick one night, for the first time!!! He was very excited. The next day he called his mom to tell her, and I guess he cried!!! Awweeee, my sweet husband. No word yet on when I can have another ultrasound to determine the sex of the baby, but I have an appointment Wednesday, and you better believe I am going to make my doctor schedule another one!!!
Well I suppose that's all........

Summer's Gone

Well that's the way it feels anyway. I am saddened that I might not get to use my Dad's pool again this year. It was like we had a really hot and humid week and that was our summer. I am a little exagatory, but that's what it seems like. Oh well that's Upstate NY for ya.....
I'm getting old.....I will be 27 in 12 days....11 if you don't count today. I know that's not that old, but for some reason it feels it. Just the thought of being 3 years away from 30.....it completely blows my mind. I still feel like I did when I was a teenager, only older!!! Where does time go?? One minute I am outside playing with my little nieces, Brit and Mal, and the next one's moved out and the other is turning 14, and wearing clothes I wore in the 80's I might add!!! How surreal is it that I am so old that my generation's style is coming back!!! UGGGHHHH!!!!
On another note, we were in Syracuse this weekend and got some stuff from Tim's mother. She is moving, ironically, on my birthday.....hmmm......should I take a hint.....just kidding!!! We bought their dresser set, which is really nice, just needs some touch ups here and there. And then we got some book cases from them. We might be getting more stuff if it doesn't sell. Tim's cousin Carrie was married on Saturday, a gorgess bride....Tim filmed it. His 91 year old Grandpa was there. He looked very pale, which worried me because he's usually pretty good. I think it is close to his time. I would really like to get down there with a tape recorder and get down some of his memories to preserve that history. He's lived through so much. He's seen Charlie Chaplin films when they actually came out!!!!
Well not much else is going on. I haven't gotten a call of when I get my next ultrasound yet. The only other thing is that the Yankees beat the Red Sox in a 5 game sweep over the weekend.....YEA!!!!! We are in first place!!!!

Misc.

So my niece is fine, at least she is safe, I think she's a little brat for pulling what she did, but at least we know where she is. She is in Indiana with her father's family. My brother and his wife have decided to let her stay there and learn her lesson on her own. I hope she realizes awfully quick how foolish she is. When her money runs out she might have a rude awakening!!! Anyways I am grateful she is safe.
On Tuesday we had our appointment to find out the sex of the baby. We got there and my bladder was already bursting. We sat there for 40 minutes before I finally went up to the desk and told them I couldn't wait any longer. They let me let a little of it out before I died from internal combustion.....and then I still waited another 20 minutes till they finally called me for the ultrasound. I told Tim I thought it was cruel and unusual torture to make a pregnant woman with a full bladder wait that long. We got in there and saw all sorts of neat things. The baby yawning, and putting it's hand up to it's mouth like it was sucking it's thumb. And then when the tech went to check the sex of the baby......little Owens did not cooperate!!! She made me get on one side and then the other, and still couldn't get a shot. So she sent me out to the waiting room while she did the next patient...thankfully letting me empty my bladder first.....and then we tried again.....still had the little one not cooperating!!!! So I don't know what the baby is:( But I am very blessed and I know I am. I have a healthy whole child inside of me, and I know it is safe, and I know that that is a huge blessing, so I cannot complain.
Yesterday I went with my dear friend Heather to shop!!! Yea for shopping!!! It was her trip and I ended up with the most stuff!!! I talked her into some very nice shoes that she normally would not purchase, and she looks totally hot in them (in a housewife way, not a streetwalker way!!!!) Then on the way home we caught a garage sale that had all this brand name baby stuff, in like mint condition. They had these new air vent bottles, still wrapped in plastic, for a quarter a piece, and binkies still in wrappers. I got 12 bottles and 4 binkies. And then the clothes were amazing but I could only pick a few pieces that could go for a boy or a girl!!! I was so ticked, because the stuff was sooo nice. And then I got a bassinet for only 3 dollars!!!! It is one of the older white wicker kinds, not the modern plastic. It is so cute!!! Heather got a great little corduroy jacket to save for later....it was very "her." The best thing about yesterday was spending time with my friend, who has such a Godly perspective, in such a difficult time. Her attitude amazes me, and I am so grateful to call her "friend."
Now Tim and I are going to Syracuse for the weekend to visit his mom and tape his cousin's wedding for her. So life has been busy, busy, busy!!! Still looking for a home for my cat!!!!

Crazy Weekend

Well I have had one heckuva weekend. It started with what was supposed to be a pleasant visit to my brother's house. They got a new house and I haven't seen it yet, and Tim was filming a wedding nearby, so I thought I would take advantage. Well I wasn't there an hour when it was discovered my 17-year old niece Brittany had run away from home. She is still gone, and we aren't for sure where she is, but pretty sure she went to her relatives in Indiana. My brother is not her real father, but he has raised her since she was less than 2 years old. Her dad is in Indiana and we think that's where she went. She's a smart kid so I am pretty sure she knows to at least go somewhere safe. Anyways prayers would be appreciated. Yesterday we went to my niece Kiersten's birthday party. She turned the big 4 on the 9th, but we had the party yesterday. She was vomiting and had a high fever, so you can imagine how much of the party the poor kid enjoyed. Thankfully her fever is down today. She still needs prayers because she has yet another infection. We aren't sure what is causing them, but we are just praying she doesn't get hospitalized again. Tim and I went and saw the second Pirates last night. It was funny because the same dude who played the geeky preacher suitor to Keira Knightley in Pride and Predjudice, played a bad guy against Kiera in Pirates. Ironic. Cut to today, we had guest ministry, and church was great!!! And then we went out to eat after church with my parents and said guest ministry, and straight to a Sunday school planning meeting with the head of Sunday school. We were on our way home from that, and witnessed an accident. A young guy about 20 rolled his truck and was stopped by a telephone pole. Thankfully he didn't hit the pole head on. He was in shock so Tim made him sit until emts got there. We were there about 2 hours because of the fact that we witnessed the accident. You should see the kid's truck, he definitely had angels watching over him.
So that was basically my weekend. Tommorow I babysit......so I guess I should actually try to get some rest.......

Cool Day

Not too much going on here. It is a cool day which is extremely nice seeing how it has been sweltering these last few weeks. It feels nice to actually have the doors and windows open instead of having the a/c on.
I can't really think of anything exciting to write. Tim and I have been blessed with a steady slew of weddings for him to tape, so some money is coming in. It is definitely welcome. We might not go to Florida now because with fuel oil costs and me delivering in winter, we are going to have to have that extra cash on hand. It really stinks, I really, really, really wanted to get away for a number of reasons. There is just so much going on with family and friends and church people. Especially with my Dad and Mom being in the ministry, it seems a new challenge arises every day. I just hate seeing my parents have to go through things. It's really tough. And of course no one wants to see their friends hurting either. But we know God is in control of all.
Tim and I have finally decided on two names. I am not sure if the girl name is solid, but pretty sure the boy name is. I feel that I will withold this information for a while. Especially if we change our minds.
Oh I do get to go see the Yankees play this year!!! That is something extremely great. My husband and I bought tickets to go to the ballpark in Toronto with my parents. We bought the tickets as an anniversary gift. I have been to Yankee stadium at least 6 times so going to Toronto will be a new experience. The reason we picked it is because this late in the season, all you can find is nose-bleed seats at Yankee stadium. At Toronto it's different because they aren't like a number one team, so their seats are better.
Well I suppose that's enough useless chatter for one day....

Anyone Here??

Well I am not sure if anyone is reading, but I guess I will post for my own benefit.....I am puzzled sometimes as to why bad things happen to good people . I know God is in control of everything and I know that He has a purpose for everything. Even if we sometimes don't understand why. I am often puzzled and perplexed by things, but I know that God is in charge of everything. Even when things are looking so bleak. I only hope that I can be the way I need to be when problems arise, a Godly woman. Today I watched a friend worship the Lord in church, even though her heart was breaking inside her. And I have heard from her own lips that God has a plan in everything. Her faith is shining through, even through a low valley in her life. I could see with my own eyes, God's hand reaching out for her, and her accepting it. Some people take a situation and allow it to turn them bitter, blaming God. But not her. I hope that when I need to have that strength and courage that I will, just like her. My friend Heather is a real woman of God.....

I Miss Sleep

I miss sleep in the worst way. There is nothing worse than getting woke up 15 minutes before your alarm clock goes off. You know it is pointless to try to sleep because the alarm is drawing near. I have been blessed this pregnancy to not have a lot of sickness, however, I can't sleep worth a hill of beans. I fall asleep and then I wake up constantly. I can only sleep on one side too. My left side feels very weird if I try to lay on it. So that makes for an uncomfortable night. Oh well, some day I guess when my kids are out of the house I will sleep again!!!
I can't wait to find out what this baby is!!! I don't know what I want really....after four years I guess just a happy healthy baby either way is just fine with me!!! I will get what God wants me to have!!! Today is supposed to be cooler and I am happy because my sister's house is like an oven. I swear it's like how hot it must have been when those three dudes were thrown into the fiery furnace!!! LOL!!!
My mom was going through her attic and gave me all this stuff from when I was a kid. Like report cards, stuff I made, etc. It made me laugh to see I was such a goofy kid!!!
Well not much else goin on!!! God bless!!!!

Losses and Miracles

On Wednesday we had a huge loss to our family. My mother's friend Lynn Cool lost her battle with cancer. She has been a friend of our family for 30 years...before I was born. It was literally my mom's last friend from an era when she was surrounded by friends. There are a few friends from long ago she still has, but not as close as Lynn. The thing that makes my mom sad is that her daughter Kristy, also could not have a child, she's my age, and so Lynn never got to be a Grandma. I am still praying that Kristy will be blessed, especially now, they need something good to happen. So if you can please keep the Cool family in your prayers, they are Cliff, Kristy, Kimmy, and Cliff Jr........
On a more happy note, I know that God is a God of miracles. He has obviously shown that to me!!! And I am happy to report that the kidney that my niece Kiersten would have had to have removed, has completely disappeared on it's own!!! That means no surgery to remove it!!! And on top of that the reflux in the good kidney is gone!!!! Praise God!!!!! They think the infections come from Kiersten not going all the way. She had a surgery when she was a baby, because the opening to allow the urine out wasn't big enough, and they think that maybe she lost sensation there, so she doesn't know she has to go. So she wets her pants literally right after you've taken her to the toilet. I am not sure what they will do to try to get her to know she has to go, but I am praising God for the miracles thus far!!!
Well I am in Syracuse right now, I am getting ready to get my hair cut at Tim's Mom's shop. Tonight is a barbecue at his Dad's friends and tommorow is Six Flags Darien Lake. Ought to be fun for me with the not being able to go on rides thing!!! UGGGHHHH!!!! Oh well. I hope you all have a blessed weekend!!!!

Fifteen Weeks, Only 25 to Go!!!

So today I am 15 weeks pregnant, or in non-pregnancy terms, 3 months and 3 weeks. If you want to know what a baby looks like at 15 weeks, go here. And no that's not my baby, just an ultrasound in general. Well Tim and I have two girls names, and no Elyse, I am sorry, one of them is not Elyse!!! And no boys names at all really. We like the name Keaton, but it doesn't have a meaningful meaning, so we just aren't sure we want to use it. I am feeling pretty good. I have tossed my cookies every morning for like 4 days straight, but I honestly don't think it's morning sickness. I have a sinus infection, which is what was causing the pesky headaches, and I think the post nasal drip that I get throughout the night causes me to gag in the morning, and since my gag reflex is weak right now, up comes the water I drink throughout the night. I don't feel queasy or anything and I am fine after that. I am sure you all or the 2 people who read this...really want to hear about it!!! Lol!!!
On other news one of my bestest buds from 5th grade on is stationed back at Ft. Drum. Her name is Heather, her husband is the one in the military, Andre. Anyways I have missed her and can't wait till she is all settled so we can visit. The only thing that stinks is Andre will be shipped out to Iraq for his second tour of duty there, in like 3 weeks, and they just got here!!! They don't even have a place to live yet and they have two little ones. The housing shortage is substantial here, there is not enough housing for all the troops. So Heather and Andre are house hunting and they put an offer on a very nice house, please pray it goes through so my friend has peace of mind before her husband goes. What stinks is, he hasn't even been home from Iraq for a year. It's just not right to send him back out for a year to eighteen months, when his family hasn't even had him back for a year. It' s kind of ridiculous. I am praying his orders get changed so he doesn't have to go back for a while. Two soldiers Tim and I have kept in prayer have returned home safe, Thank God. Greg Stafford and Tim Cline. So we are praising God for that.
Well enough babbling I suppose. God Bless!!!!

More Useless Knowledge About Me

My favorite color is blue.....there, that is the useless knowledge, if any one cares!!! Today is okay. I am not feeling well but I don't think it has anything to do with pregnancy. A long time ago when I was in college I had a teacher who happened to be a Christian.....and every time I was sick I kind of went to her like a second mom. She started asking me my symptoms because I got sick a lot. When I told her my symptoms she said it sounded like yeast allergies. She has them and has to be really careful of what she eats. The symptoms are migraines, typical allergic reactions, nausea, sleeplessness......etc.......anyways.......last night I made homeade pizza, I was up all night till 4am, and when I woke up my head felt extremely stuffed and yuck, and my stomach is a little queesy. Everytime I make homeade pizza I have noticed this happen. So needless to say I think I am going to try to stay away from yeasty foods and see if that seems to help. The problem is I don't know what all contains yeast??? I guess I shall have to investigate.
The pregnancy seems to be going well...I am feeling pretty good. Sometimes I find it hard to believe that there is a living being inside of me. It is just the weirdest thing. It's like the baby is there and my mind knows it, but when I really think about it, I am just amazed that there is a living soul, right inside of me!!! It's so strange. I think I have felt him/her move. Tim and I finally decided on a girl name....and we kind of have a boy name.....but I am not saying right now because we could change our minds. Well I hope all is well with everyone!!!

Sleep

I was up all night, and then at 4am decided to read since I was tossing and turning, read until 5:30am, was woke at 6:30am with a little one, one of 4 overnight, throwing up on me. And my new bed......have 7 kids right now.....beginning to think I will never sleep again!!!! Or stop my sisters from putting me in the posistion to have to watch their kids all the time!!!! AGGGHHHHH!!!! My reward is in Heaven, my reward is in Heaven, my reward is Heaven........

Weddings and such things

So this weekend was spent preparing and taking part in a dear friend's wedding. My best bud Rushteen.....Rjay's sister and Heather's sister in law. Friday we had the rehearsal, followed by a barbecue at the groom's family camp. It's really neat, it's on a pond, they have boats and paddle boats...pretty nifty. Saturday was like the hottest day and I was sucked into my bridesmaid's dress, seeing how it was one I wore 6 years ago for a wedding. It is a size 6!!! Thank God for empire waists or my belly definitely would not have fit into it!!! Heather was also appreciative her gown fit seeing how we both had ours before we were pregnant. Many tears were shed as the beautiful bride walked down the isle. I told Heather that mine and hers were just pregnancy hormones!!! LOL!!!! Anyways it was a great day, and the wedding was a much deserved blessing for the bride and groom.
On other news, my niece Kiersten is home currently. She is on an antibiotic that they aren't supposed to give to people under 18 and she's 3. The docs didn't even tell Tracey that, the pharmicist did and he didn't want to fill it. It is an anthrax antidote. Not that Kiersten has that but it is the only medication that will kill the bacteria that she has. Basically the medication could cause her lungs to collapse, but the doctor told Tracey that the risks have to be weighed against the benefits. We are just praying that there will be no side effects on her. She has already been through so much. God will answer our prayers, I know He will.
On yet another note....the 105 year old woman I was taking care of at the nursing home, Nellie, has passed away. I was sad, but very happy for her because she wanted to "see her folks, and husband, and son," so badly. She was a believer so I believe she is in Heaven with all of those people she was aching to see so bad. I would catch her praying and asking God to take her, she would ask Him how long until it was time to go. She just wanted to go so desperately. I tried to visit her as often as I could since I quit the nursing home. I visited her about 4 times since May. I just hope that she knows now how much I cared. I don't know what God allows in Heaven, if He lets people know what people on earth thought or felt about a person. I guess I will find out one day.
Well not much else, feeling good, can't complain!!!!

Stuff

I am going to try to post my ultrasound pix but Tim is going to have to help me with the scanning, etc....cuz I have never used one ever.....sad....!!! I went to the hospital yesterday and had to control my emotions for a split second. Kiersten was on her bed, playing like a normal little girl, but she looked pale and had a bandage wrapped all the way up her arm so her iv didn't get yanked out. It just made me want to cry for a split second, but I caught myself quick so I didn't upset her. Tracey looked extremely tired. She took Aidan and Tristan and Kendal for a small shopping trip to Walmart and I stayed with Kiersten. She was acting pretty normal, playing with the toys I bought her. Hopefully she will be getting out tommorow. Tracey is going to have to take her to a specialist in Rochester because she feels no one up here or in Syracuse are doing much for her. She most likely will have to have the bad kidney taken out.
In other news....I have this really weird feeling in my throat. I don't know if it is part of the pregnancy indigestion or what, but it feels like there is a chunk of something in my throat at all times. No matter how many times I swallow it won't go away. I am going to ask my doc about it tommorow. Not sure what to do about my cat. I really want to keep him but he's killing the allergies, plus we think he is spraying. This morning I came downstairs and my nephew Tristan was like, the cat or the dog peed on your couch. Pretty sure it was kitty....AGGGGGHHHH!!! So does anyone know someone who lives out in the country and will treat a cat good. I will pay to have him neutered first!!!!!

Rainy Day

Well it's July and it is raining here in the North Country...what else is new!! It feels like a rainy day, not just because it's raining, but because I am worried about Kiersten. She is back in the hospital again. Her infection is back, or never left. She has a type of bacteria that cannot be treated with normal anti-biotics. So I guess she will be in the hospital for a few days, hopefully not more. I guess the hardest part is that she is so little, she is only 3, she will be 4 next month. And to go through this so little is just hard for a kid. They don't really understand what's going on....although sometimes I guess ignorance really is bliss. My poor sister is having a very hard time understandably. I feel like there is not much I can do for her. The only thing I know I can do is pray, and I really appreciate all of your prayers as well....
On a happier note, I had my ultrasound yesterday. The baby is fully formed, you could see the face, the body, the little arms and legs. He? or She? had one of their arms up above their head. That's how I sleep, lol.....The tech said she had to get one more picture and she was just about to and the baby turned right over so you couldn't see what you needed to see. I said that's Tim's child, taking after him....Tim says, that's your child, sassy....LOL!!! It was great to see the progress, because sometimes, other than the symptoms, you don't even feel pregnant. I can't wait for the baby to start moving. I can't wait until next month either because then I find out what "it," is so I can stop calling "it," it!!!! My husband was in awe yesterday. I forget that he can't feel the things I can inside, so for him the picture is all he sees. I might scan my ultrasound and put it up if no one thinks that's too weird!!! Well I hope all are doing well!!!

Just Stuff

So I suppose I should update, not that many people read this!!! For those faithful I will though!!! So my niece Kiersten is sick again. The infection is back and she might have to be hospitalized again. Keep in mind she is only three years old. She wet her pants 5 times when I watched her the other day, and like 8 for my mom. Not a good thing, she really needs prayers. So please pray!!! Also a very special lady in our church was just diagnosed with breast cancer, so if you could keep her in your prayers as well that would be much appreciated. Her name is Noreen.
I am feeling well. My husband and I went to the drive-in and saw Superman and Click. Loved Superman, Click had some stuff in it that wasn't necessary.....but I guess that's Hollywood, you can hardly watch anything nowadays. It was good, just some questionable humor. Oh well. I had fun with my hubby, we stayed up until 4am that night. The next day was spent in the pool and at a friend's bachlorette party.
Tommorow I have an ultrasound so I will probably be in shock with how big the baby has gotten. I haven't had one in 4 weeks. The thing that was great with the fertility clinic was that they gave me an ultrasound once a week, so I got to see the development every week. Now I am like a normal pregnant woman so I have to wait to see like everyone else!!! Oh well.....
I got to see my two oldest friends over the past few weeks, Heather Jo and Elyse. Heather is moving here because her husband is being stationed at Ft. Drum. I am so excited because we grew up together!!! Now if I could talk Elyse into moving back!!! Oh well.....God Bless!!!

Holidays

Well we have been at my husband's family for the whole weekend for the 4th of July. All I can say is visiting family is exhausting!!! I can't wait to go home!!! Tim is a child of divorce so we have to try to balance both families every time...very frustrating. And then there are always hurt feelings because one person or another doesn't feel like you're spending enough time with them, and no matter what you can't please everyone.....oh well. Other than that it has been nice. Tommorow we travel back home to go to my parent's 4th barbecue.
In other news my baby is about 2 and half inches long!!! And growing rapidly!!! I already have a belly and everyone is asking me if I am expecting twins or if I am farther along than they thought....it's actually quite embarrassing.....but the thing is, I weigh exactly the same....very odd!!! Hopefully I won't gain too much. I am not eating any bad stuff!!! I am starting my second trimester....no morning sickness, yeah!!! Well that's about it for now. Not much here......God Bless!!!!

Babies and Kiersten

Well since she posted it, I will share my joy with my dear friend Heather. She is also pregnant, and as her husband RJ stated in their testimony at church, "Baby Owens is going to have a little playmate....." God answers our hearts desires!!! Praise Him for His many blessings!!!
My niece Kiersten is home, and she is doing much better. She still needs prayers though. She is on antibiotics for her infection. They are not sure if they are going to remove her right kidney or not yet. My sister and the dr. are coming up with treatment options until November, and if they work, they do not want to put Kiersten through surgery. So hopefully that will work out. Thanks everyone for your prayers.
I am really starting to feel old lately. Maybe it is the pregnancy, or the fact that my ten year high school reunion is next year, or that my oldest niece is attending college.....or that I am almost 27. I don't know but I hate feeling old. I feel like life is passing by too fast!!!! There are so many things I want to do on my short time here, so much I need to accomplish, not just for myself, but for my Savior and His kingdom. I just want my life to mean something. I want to be able to leave a legacy. With all the vanity of Hollywood and pop culture, and all the fleeting selfish things of this world, it is hard to think that one little life can affect anything for the better. But hopefully I can make a difference somewhere......for now I am content to wait on the Lord for His direction!!! Hope all are well!!!

Kiersten Update

My beautiful niece Kiersten is such a huge part of my life. Such a huge part in fact, that when she was admitted to the hospital, my heart ached with worry and grief. I was so overcome, I just couldn't hold it in, thinking about this little girl who has so blessed my life.
I am happy to say that she is probably going to get out of the hospital today. They are trying to find out what bacteria she has so they can give her proper antibiotics. They are supposed to know today. Her doctor and my sister are trying to come up with a course of action for treatment. It is possible that in November she will have to have her right kidney removed, which is pretty extensive. I misspoke in my last post, I thought that kidney was completely gone, but it is there, it just doesn't function at all. Anyways they aren't sure yet if it is causing the problem.
Needless to say, she still needs prayers. I am still praying for a miraculous healing. But I am very thankful she is able to get out today, and that she is still able to be her sunshiny little self!! I am also thankful for all of your prayers and continued prayer!!! God Bless!!!

P.S. If you didn't read my previous post, this one won't make any sense, so read it!!!!

Prayer

Hi all, I am asking for extreme prayers for my niece Kiersten. She has been admitted to the hospital for a severe infection. Right now they are waiting for tests to come back to see if it is in her kidney. She only has one kidney and it refluxes, meaning it sends toxins back into itself instead of completely eliminating them. Anyone familiar with kidney problems, knows that if anything happens to her other kidney she will need surgery or more severe.....we are praying that it doesn't have to come to that. So I am asking all of you for your prayers, and for prayers for my sister. She is a single mom, and battling things like this alone can be very hard. We really need a miraculous healing of Kiersten's kidneys, and there is no other God who can heal like our God. He is a God of miracles. Where two or more are gathered, the Bible tells us that God hears our prayers.....so please send some up for my little niece. Thank you all and God bless!!!

Fun

Well I am hoping to have some fun today. RJay and Heather, my parents, and my foster brothers are coming over for dinner tonight. I am making cubed steak, salt potatoes, and corn on the cob. I actually can't wait to eat it!!! Maybe after that we will have a nice rousing game of Phase 10, which gets very competitive, and very cutthroat, fast!! It's really fun though. My mom is the one we have to watch out for, she's like a lioness, waiting to jump in for the kill!!!
Not much else is really going on. I wonder if it's pointless to keep this blog going or not. I know different friends can read it, etc. But I just don't know if I have anything of value to add to anything.
I guess the baby is about the size of a strawberry right now. I am 9 and a half weeks along. Only 31 more to go!! Lol....that's quite a long ways away. Thankfully I have not been real sick or too uncomfortable. God has blessed me. I do have trouble sleeping though, so that's not fun, but if that's the only symptom than I can't complain!! I am thinking about joining my husband in his business. We are going to film weddings and special projects. That way we can make some good money on the side. I haven't used a camera in years. That's what I went to college for though. Although I kind of got out of the whole editing process because I had Tim....now I guess I will have to learn it!!! What radio/television grad doesn't know how to edit when they graduate??? Apparently me!!! Lol!!! So needless to say, I guess I should have better taken advantage of my college years...oh well...never too late. Well not much is up, so I will end this boring old post!!!God Bless!!!

????

Does anyone read this anymore?? Just curious......

New Day

Well today is a new day, and I am feeling better....thanks in part to some sweet friends who posted comments!!! Thanks guys!!! Heather Jo I wish you had an actual site so I could respond back to you!!! I think pregnancy hormones contributed to my last post somewhat, although that is the way I felt. Most of the time I can let things roll off my back, but sometimes things can build up, so I was just venting!!! Sorry all!!! It's just sometimes I feel like no one gets me. I feel like people think I am a strange person....I don't know...anyways.....
So today I cleaned two bathrooms in my sister's house and swept and mopped some floors. And then my mother and I went for a mile long walk, which felt really good. I want to stay in good shape because I don't want to gain more than I am supposed to. And before anyone yells at me for cleaning, don't worry, I know how to do it without straining myself!!! Tim and I might have a chance to go to Florida. I am not sure if it is going to happen, but we were offered a four star resort for a week. It's Tim's Dad's time share. Him and his wife had like 3 weeks they accumulated and never used so they offered it to their kids. All we would have to pay is gas, food and entertainment, which I won't be able to go on any amusement rides, so that kind of stinks. But it would be nice to get away....especially to the beach!!! We will see.....not much else going on here. God Bless!!!

Not Your Average House Wife

So I am kind of having sort of a hard time lately. . .I am a unique person....there's no one else like me, and I should enjoy that. But I find a lot of people don't really accept me for who I am. Almost every woman I know have very specific qualities, mostly related to being a wife and mom. For instance they can cook well, they have well-decorated houses, they breast-feed their babies when they are young, some of them home school....the list goes on. And they are great people. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THEM. But what is really getting at me is people wanting me to be in THAT mold. I am a housewife, but I have a job, I can't stay home. My house is clean, but unkempt a lot of times, I can cook, but not great. I don't shop at stores like Old Navy and Gap, I am not suzy decorator with my house, and I like doing my hair and makeup. It just bugs me, I have gotten some comments that have been hurtful....comments about what kind of wife I am, comments about choices I plan on making with my children. I mean am I going to go to Hell for not breastfeeding or for not getting top designer clothes for my children. I had a friend (no one who reads this) argue with me that I needed to breastfeed.....I mean argue. And I understand the argument behind it, but why can't people except my decision not to? Why do people see me as loud and obnoxious, and not the perfect housewife? I have weird tastes, like flapper items and old movie glamour. I like to shop at Hot Topic. (No goth items!!) I like watching shows from when I was a kid, like Alf or Punky Brewster. I hate decorating, I would rather buy a house already done in a style I like. I hate cooking because I don't have time. I speak what I think, which gets me in trouble once in a while. I just don't fit in anywhere. I am not like anyone I know. I have had a hard time with this for quite a while. It has kind of been an ongoing thing. I get "reprimanded," by other women sometimes. Like I am a kid or something and they feel the need to admonish me into their way of thinking. Again this is no one who reads this so I don't want to give you the wrong idea, it's just something I am highly frustrated over. I don't mean to complain. I just wish I had someone in my life that would sit down and watch a silent movie with me, and tell me they support my decisions, and shop with me at Hot Topic and other "fine" stores. I wish I had someone in my life who knew big band songs, and who Barbara Stanwyck and Clara Bow are. Who likes the art deco style of the 20's but grew up loving Punky Brewster in the 80's. I don't know I am blabbering on with my frustrations. I guess that even though I am an adult, I still feel like a gawky teenager trying to fit in a place where there is not one person who can relate to how I feel or how I am. I have great friends, I love them very much, they are kind and wonderful and I couldn't live without them....I just wished I knew someone who knew me..........the real me.............and they loved every part......Jesus is the only one who does. I take comfort in knowing that He revels in my uniqueness, even if it turns off others..............

Not much

Well I am not up to much. My life is pretty boring right now, not too much going on. Today I am not babysitting so I am taking it easy and just basically being lazy. I really needed to cuz I have been on the go so much my body just cries for rest!!! So I am listening to it!! Tommorow I have my last appointment with the fertility clinic. It makes me kind of sad because they are so supportive, and if it wasn't for their help I wouldn't have this little miracle inside me right now. I know God used them!!! I will start seeing my regular doc next week. It will kind of stink because I won't get as many ultrasounds so I won't see the baby's development that much. Oh well.
Today is my sister Tracey's birthday. Happy birthday Tracey!!! I don't think she reads this though.....hmm....what else to talk about....not much....my life is pretty boring.
Oh! Well we did get some good news today...the law guardian for Tracey's case seems to be smartening up someway, so we are cautiously hopeful that that will help Tracey's case. The kids are doing good but my niece Kiersten needs prayer for some health issues. Last night I had Aidan overnight. The little ham. He makes me laugh he's so silly. I love the little booger. Last night he was jamming to music in his carseat, bopping his head in time to the music. He was even singing the Beatles...Good Day Sunshine....and he's never even heard it before!!! He's so smart!! Well not much else going on here........

Blog Weirdness

So I haven't been on in a few days cuz some wacko weird thing happened with my blog template, and fortuneately I have a very nice friend who fixed it for me. Thanks so much Jackie!!! She even put the links that she knew on there for me. What a great pal. So I have had to redo my links, so if you think the order of your name on the side is in order of importance, you are wrong, I love you all!!! Anyways I am liking the new flapper background, although she is a little risque, but flappers were risque so what are you going to do?? It's honestly not my favorite background because of the colors, but I will keep it for a bit. Besides I can't harrass Jackie too much!!! Lol!!
So I had an appointment yesterday. Everything is going well. What' really, really, weird is that I ran into a couple I knew as a child who never had children and we always wondered if they just didn't want any or if they couldn't have any. So who do I run into but them at my fertility clinic. The pain this poor couple must be facing after at least 15-20 years of trying. I know people can say, well they can adopt, but until you're in their shoes, you'll never understand it. Even my four years of hardship is nothing compared to what they must have faced all these years. I won't put their names, because a couple people might know them and I don't know if it's a secret. But I would ask that you all would keep this couple in prayer, because God knows who they are, and they would be great parents.
On to another subject, not a lot of people know, but my sister was in a very abusive relationship a while back. Her husband is sheer evil....you can't imagine. Anyways she is trying to piece her life back together, and suddenly he decides he wants to have partial custody of his kids. He has never seen Aidan until a month ago and Aidan is already almost two!! He hasn't seen Kiersten since she was a baby. He wanted nothing to do with them and now he and his lawyer are doing very sinister, evil things. I mean evil....I won't go into it. But I again ask that all of you would keep this situation in prayer. We are praying that her ex's lies and deciets would be uncovered and that the judge will see through him. And my sister needs prayer, as she is naturally a wreck. I really would appreciate prayers for these things, the Bible says if two or more are in agreement, so I ask for you all to agree!!! God bless all!!!

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Break

I am taking a very short break from cleaning my house. I stress very short because I have our first cell group meeting here tonight. We did away with the generation cell because there was very much so lack of commitment and interest from the kids. It got to the point where mostly only my foster bros would come and they are technically not youth. They are 25 and 26, but they are a little slow, so they enjoy more youth oriented things. Anyways it was almost just a cell group for Tim and I and RJay and Heather. So my father/pastor decided to change it to our own cell group. So therefore my house must be cleaned for tonight!!!
On another note, just to clear it up a bit, I didn't actually hear the baby's heartbeat, I just saw it. The nurse pointed it out and it looked like a little winking eye. I have another appointment this Friday where I am sure I will get another picture of the baby. Right now it is the size of a small raspberry. I haven't really been sick thank God, but I have had some slight queasiness and indigestion this week. I am praying it won't grow into full-blown morning sickness. Other than that I mostly feel good. I already have a slight belly, but they tell me a lot of that is left over from the hormones I was on. Oh well, it's just going to grow anyways so why not now?? Well that's about all the boring details of my life that I have to share right now. God bless!!!

A Precious Little Heartbeat

I saw my baby's heartbeat yesterday!!!! The nurse pointed it out. She said, "You see that little thing that looks like a slow wink?" And then she told us it was the heart!!! If I had any doubts of not being pregnant, they are definitely now erased!!! Praise God for a little heartbeat!!!! I just can't see how they can't call that a life for abortion purposes, when you can clearly see a heart sustaining and supporting the baby. That whole concept boggles my mind, people are so selfish!!! I want to make a maternity tee that says, "I chose life!" I think I will somehow. Well I am officially due on January 17, 2007. There is only one baby in there, that they can see. Which is fine with me because I want what God wants for me!!! I wanted to cry when I saw the heartbeat, but the nurse was so matter of fact that the moment came and went fast. My husband is so excited. He is being so good to me already. The only thing I hate is I catch him staring at me nonstop!!! I can't even eat without him gawking. He tells me all the time I am beautiful. I tell him to knock it off!!! At least when I eat. Right now we are at his Dad's in Syracuse. Last night we went out to eat which was okay, Tim picked the place so it wasn't really anything I liked much because we are on opposite sides of the spectrum with food. Oh well, it's his birthday weekend so I will let him get away with it!!! Hope all are well!!!!